Good morning to you. I have been a awake for about an hour and thinking of cooking something soon.
Today for the first time in a while I decided to change my desktop wallpaper. I’m running Windows 7, so I get the bonus of wallpaper that changes at a set time. I decided to make it happy images of nature. I needed it, I have had Thomas Kinkade on for months before his passing. Some how those idyllic paintings of his, seemed to bring about sorrow and feelings of sadness. It was time for a change.
I’m a visual person, that is not to say that I’m shallow and I care only about outward appearances. Far from it, you can be the most beautiful person and your soul can be dark and rotten to the core. Make you an ugly person that would as Yoda would say. My visuals when it comes to technology must be reflecting of the mood I find myself in. Right now I’m not exactly jumping for joy, but I’m trying to rise from the ashes that were left of me a while ago. Considering I don’t take medication and have yet to see a professional I’m doing okay.
Don’t get me wrong, I think psychologist are one of God’s greatest gifts to mankind, but I find the best person to understand me, is me. The stepping stones of my journey I lay out just so, surrounded by as much poetic beauty as I can find, magic of soul, faith in whatever holds me at the time, and belief in my dreams, which are undoubtedly a reflection of my soul.
Smiles will come my way soon. I hope. So note to self smile! I know telling someone who has fallen apart, to just smile though your heart is aching is easier said than done. However, once achieved is like God has stood right next to you and summoned a cheering squad.
On a final note, being that I’m awake, this early, I had a change to glance at the moon and it’s looking absolutely gorgeous! I know, things like that most of you might see on the drive home one night. However, really, really look at it from time to time. You will find it different somehow. Every once in a while, I’d like to think it carries my thoughts with it.
Remember life is extremely difficult, if it were easy time would seem to stand still and we be the less wiser for it. I prefer to look at it as there is always a light at the end of the long rode home, where ever that maybe.